Have you ever been annoyed by a successful person, because you thought you were more intelligent than them? Maybe it was a boss. Maybe it was a political figure or a leader.
It's especially maddening when this person is creating rules that dictate your life. I can definitely relate. I've had my share of bosses that I thought were less than brilliant.
So what is it that makes them successful? That's what I've always wondered and what has always bugged me. I mean, shouldn't intelligence be a prerequisite to leadership? The answer… not really.
It turns out the biggest reason people are successful is: consistent action, not intelligence.
Then the question is, are these three words ruining your life…?
The unmagical words
Those words are: I don't know.
It's not drive, it's not motivation, it's not lack of passion that keeps people from doing what they want. It's not knowing where to start, or how to get from A to B. That's the single biggest reason people don't take action to make their dreams a reality.
So how can we overcome this? How can we stop letting obscurity keep us from becoming successful? The answer is pretty simple: You have to develop the ability to stop caring about not knowing. (I've written about this before, where I call it “putting yourself on auto-response.”)
You have to cultivate the habit of doing before knowing. This seems like a daunting thing to do, but it's really actually a very easy habit to create. And there are a multitude of possibilities that exist right now that you can practice it.
Easiest thing in the world
For example, how many time does your spouse or partner ask you “What do you want to have for dinner?” and you respond, “I don't know.” (This happens to me all the time, and it's maddening.) Next time, instead of using those three dirty words, just ask yourself, “What's something I'd like to have for dinner?” and then respond.
Now do this when someone asks where you'd like to hang out, or what you'd like to spend the evening doing. Instead of re-actively saying “I don't know,” take the time to come up with a response. Even if you're not 100% completely stoked about the idea, just come up with something you'd be satisfied with doing. Anything other than I don't know is an improvement.
Next, try asking yourself “How could I best use my time, right now?” or “What is the highest leverage use of my time, right now?” Take a minute to brainstorm and mentally prioritize. If you're having trouble coming up with an answer, just pick whatever you think would be the most productive use of your time. Remember, anything is better than the three words we shall not speak of.
Just imagine all of the possibilities for you to practice actively making decisions based on your desires, rather than re-actively defaulting to unconsciousness. There are so many little ways you can practice this skill. I think you'll be surprised at how often you're able to rehearse it.
The difference between living and existing
Okay, so you've mastered it with the little stuff. Now it's time to use it on the things that really matter. Stuff like your passions and career.
If you're not doing something you love or at least like for a living, you're selling yourself short. And I bet the reason why you're not pursuing something better is because you don't know what you'd rather do. Instead of allowing that not knowing to dwell in your psychic space, cast it out. Don't tolerate it anymore. If you don't know what you're passionate about, move from not knowing to seeking a path that will allow you to explore what you might love to do. This might mean reading a book on different career pursuits. It might mean googling your hobbies for possible career intersections. Whatever it is, practice that until you move into a state of knowing.
The reason I'm so passionate about this is because I've seen so many lives unfulfilled because of not knowing. It saddens me to think that such a simple phrase can have such a devastating impact.
I urge you to practice moving in the direction of knowing, when you feel stuck in a state of indecision. All it takes is one little shift.
It could mean the difference between making a dying and making a living.
有没有对某些成功人士心存不屑,因为觉的自己远比他们聪明的多?也许这个人是你老板。或者是某个政要首脑。而让人更讨厌的是有些时候这些人的决策往往又 将影响你的生活。几乎可以肯定。 我以前的某些老板就不是很聪明。但到底是什么让他们成为成功人士?我一直想知道答案也一直被这些问题所困扰。 我的意思是,难道才智不是成为领袖的首要条件么?但答案…还真的不是。
结果我发现成功与否的最大关键是:持之以恒的行动,不是才智。
所以问题是,这三个字有没有也影响到你的生活?
令人讨厌的字眼
这三个字是:“不知道”。
人们不是因为缺乏动力,也不是因为缺乏动机,更不是因为没有激情去实现他们的目标。而是不知道从哪里开始,不知道怎样从起点到达目标。这就是为什么我们无法为实现梦想而行动的最大原因。
所以我们怎样克服这个问题?我们怎样停止迷茫达到成功? 答案其实很简单:你需要有能力不在担心对事情的迷茫。
你需要培养在瞻前顾后之前开始行动的习惯? 这看起来有点吓人,但确是个很容易培养的习惯。 现在有很多办法可以让你去实践。
世界上最简单的事
举个例子,有多少次你的爱人或者同伴问起“今天的晚餐你想吃些什么?”而你却回答“不知道”或者“无所谓”。 (难以置信的是,我就经常这样说。) 下一次如果在有人问起,尝试不要说这三个字,而是在心里问问自己,“晚餐我真的想吃什么?”再做回答。
从现在开始当别人问起去哪儿消遣或者晚上要做什么的时候都先想一下。。不要直接脱口而出“我不知道”, 真正花点时间思考一下。就算你想的事情不是完全那么激动人心,最起码拿出一件你真心想做的事情作为答案。 不在用“我不知道”作为应付已经是个进步了。
下一步,试着问自己“我能怎样利用现在的这段时间?”或者“现在这段时间用来做什么最好?” 花点时间想想或者给事情排一下序。如果你实在不能想出什么好点子,最起码选择一件能充分利发挥这段时间的效能的事情。记住,任何具体的事情都好过“不知道”这三个字。
试想一下以自己的愿望作为决定的基础,而不是处于机械的无意识状态的可能性。有很多办法可以练习这种能力。你肯定想不到这样能有多容易。
生活与生存的区别
好的,现在你已经能控制小事上的反应了。 现在将他们用在更有意义的事情上。 比如你的事业或者热情所在。
如果你不是以你所爱或者最起码以你所喜欢的事业谋生,你的生活就是在投机。 而且我认为你不去追求更高目标的原因是因为你不知道什么是更应该做的。不要继续任由自己处于茫然,你应该将这种思维赶走。。不要允许自己有这样的想法。如果你不知道自己对什么事有激情的话,起码从这种茫然中走出来,找一份你可以探索的职业,或许你就会找到激情。也许这就代表现在拿起一本其他行业的书籍。 也许代表在Googles上搜索一下自己的兴趣范围里有什么样的职业。 无论怎样, 一直保持练习,直到你能习惯性的做出符合自己意愿的决策。
我对这件充满热情的原因就是因为我看到太多人因为茫然而无法实现对生活的愿景。这种令人沮丧的结果迫使我思考原来这样简单的三个字可以带来这样大的消极影响。
我期望当你踌躇不决的时候可以使用这种按照自己意志来决策的办法。所需要的只是一点小小的改变。
也许这就代表生活和生存的区别。